Segways and Chicken Dances

Here is the awesome thing, although I am posting about it belatedly: I WENT ON A SEGWAY TOUR OF CHICAGO!

Here is the not awesome thing: I have videos of it, and pictures that my aunt texted to me, but I can’t email myself the videos nor can I do anything with pictures that other people text me except look at them, so unfortunately they won’t be posted here, which makes me very sad, because they’re so much fun.  If I were a fourteen-year-old, this is the part where I would go MY PHONE SUUUXXXXX.

Anyway.

To put it plainly, segwaying is seriously fun.  My aunt came to Chicago for business for a few days, so we went to see what all the segway fuss was about (in the beginning of November, which actually wasn’t too cold, hooray!). 

We got to the segway place—basically it was a big empty warehouse at Lake Point Tower—and practiced for a while before heading out.  Here’s the thing I didn’t know: you don’t have to shift a gear or push a button or twist a knob to go, stop, or turn.  You just rock forward and back on your heels and kind of move the handles to the left or right.  It’s a very fluid and intuitive motion that, after a while, feels completely normal.

Once our guide was convinced we weren’t going to kill ourselves, he led us out on the street, past Navy Pier out to Millennium Park and Grant Park, to Buckingham Fountain and the Art Institute, the Field Museum and Soldier Field (I just realized both those names have the word “field” in them and wonder if that means anything, like how the Field museum is close to the football field?  I don’t know), and basically it was a super sweet time.

Also we got to wear bright lime green helmets.  And nobody fell in Lake Michigan and nobody died.  And hopefully, none of the drivers on Michigan Avenue got too annoyed when 11 amateur segwayers took up the crosswalk.

I highly recommend segwaying.  To get an idea of how excellent it can be, please enjoy this clip from my favorite show:

Okay, screw it.  I wanted to put up a good clip of Gob Bluth on his segway but Youtube has failed me.  They’re all too short and not the one I wanted.

So in place of that, here is a compilation of chicken dances from Arrested Development, which is just as worthy of your time.



Why I Love Chicago: Lake Shore Drive

After three months in this city (to the day), I can say that I am officially a sucker for Chicago.

You’re probably thinking, Ha!  Wait ‘til that famous Chicago winter hits!  To which I would like to reply, yes, it will be cold, but get this:

·         I lived in Erie, PA, for five years, so I know something about cold and snow.

·         I don’t have a car, which is a whole different hassle in the winter.

·         And I have a floor-length down coat with a big fur hood, so take that!

Things I don't have to worry about.

Anyway, my main point is this: I love Chicago.  It’s not perfect, but it is pretty, pretty great. 

You can order any kind of food you like and have it delivered.  Tonight I am having pad Thai.  Last week I had a Cajun shrimp po’ boy.

If you need something, there is a good chance you can find a store or a service very close to where you live to get it done.

If there’s a musician or a show you really want to see on tour, it probably won’t be too long ‘til the show comes to town.

These are all efficient and convenient things, but that’s not the best part.  One of the best parts is the view on my commute home from work.

See, I have a job in Hyde Park (haha!  Guess where!) and I live up in Lakeview.  This accounts for a loooooong ride to and from work. 

In the morning, it can be a little rough, but in the evening, riding the bus along Lake Shore Drive offers the most breathtaking view.

This picture was taken in the summer, and not by me, but whatever.

You’ve got Lake Michigan on the right, which might have waves crashing on the beach if it’s windy enough, which it often is.  And up ahead is the city skyline. 

Last week the bus I got on was so crowded, I had to stand up at the very front, right next to the driver.  This has become my new favorite place to be on a bus.  You can see everything through the enormous windows, you don't have to drive, and if you happen to be coming into the city on Lake Shore Drive at dusk, well, it's an experience worth having.  If the bus is going really fast, it feels like flying.  Is that sentimental?  Well, I'm sentimental.

Not that public transportation is anything to be passionate about, but it does have its perks.  Gorgeousness is one of them.

Chicago is beautiful.  The end!

Why I Haven't Posted Lately

Work: work is crazy busy. 

School: finals are coming up and I have a lot to do.

Travel: I ride a bus, a train, and a bus to work and back, which eats up time and gets very exhausting after awhile.

Wash, rinse, repeat the above several times and you get the picture.

Hope to be back soon!

Parody-ations on a Theme

If you’ve had high school English, there’s a very good chance you’ve read this poem by William Carlos Williams:

This Is Just To Say

I have eaten

the plums

that were in

the icebox

and which

you were probably

saving

for breakfast

Forgive me

they were delicious

so sweet

and so cold

This is a wonderful and very well-known poem.  It’s one of my favorites, although I don’t know if that maybe makes me a little bit clichéd.  But in my writing workshop tonight, we read some “variations on a theme” (ahem, parodies) based on this poem, such as this one by Kenneth Koch:

I chopped down the house that you had been saving to live in next summer.

I am sorry, but it was morning, and I had nothing to do

and its wooden beams were so inviting.

(There were several more, but that one, to me, is especially perfect.)

The final part of the exercise was to write our own variations.  Here, for your amusement or disgust, whichever, are my contributions:

I shot your purebred Greyhound this morning

the one you were training for the dog show.

Forgive me.  It kept me up all night.

I broke in through your window last night

to take back the wrench you borrowed.

Forgive me, for my faucet was dripping.

I am sorry I stabbed you in the eye.

Please understand, I was bored,

and you wear really hideous glasses.