First-World Problems, I Guess

So I may have mentioned before that I have a hyper-developed guilt complex.  Guilt, guilt, guilt.  I feel bad about everything.  I feel responsible for things that aren’t my fault.  I feel bad for things that no one else will ever, ever care about.  It’s so fun!

The latest object of my guilt is the fact that I live in this beautiful and amazing city and don’t really go out all that much.  I could probably count the number of restaurants I’ve been to in Chicago on one hand.  I haven’t really explored much other than my own Lakeview area and the Loop.  (Bucktown?  Wicker Park?  What?)  And it’s super embarrassing that with all my history in dance and music, I have not been to one dance concert or music concert in this city.  No theater, no nothing.  I’ve been to some poetry readings in someone’s apartment and that’s it.

There are legitimate reasons, I guess…money is a big one, since you need a lot of it to go to concerts and plays.  Time is another.  And then there’s that whole “I don’t have anyone to go with” issue, which is probably just an excuse because lots of people go to things by themselves.  I think.

This weekend I have absolutely no plans, and I’m completely exhilarated by that fact.  It’s like…I GET TO SLEEP AND SIT ON THE COUCH AND WATCH TV!!!!!

Ew.  I don’t recognize myself.  And I feel like, as a Chicagoan, I should be going out every night and doing amazing, exotic things. 

It’s Saturday night.  What am I missing?

Blue Man Group?

Second City?

I’m sure one or two pop stars are here tonight.

Probably some famous comedians.  Or at least really funny ones who aren’t famous yet but will be.

A symphony, a choir.

ICE SKATING.

I was watching the news and Jason Segel was here tonight, so whatever.

And here I am, doing things I could do in any small town in the US, getting excited by things like Command strips and cleaning supplies.  Baking muffins from scratch and being like OOOOH, LOOK AT THIS NEW LAUNDRY STARCH!  IT SMELLS SOOOOO GOOD!  LET’S IRON!  IRONING IS SO FUN!!!

Yeahhhhh.

Oh, and I spent 9 hours putting together my IKEA dresser last week, by myself, and it was perfectly blissful.

Before.

After.

What is wrong with me?  It’s like I got old.

(And I’m not kidding about Command strips.  They are the shiznet.)