The Best Thing Ever: #78

SUNGLASSES are the best thing ever.

I am notoriously bad with sunglasses.  Every pair I have ever owned has either been lost, broken, or horribly mangled and melted in the dryer.  (That really is true.)

This is why I have never owned a pair that’s cost more than $12—and even that is pushing it.  My average price limit is $5.  Because I just know that within a month or two, I’ll have to buy new ones.

I spent the last five years in northwestern Pennsylvania, where the sun is insanely bright in the winter, so you have to wear sunglasses pretty much year-round.  I don’t know how different that might be in Chicago.  Looking forward to finding out, and to discovering where I can still buy $5 pairs in this big city.

Anyway!  Why are sunglasses the best thing ever?

1.  Obviously, they play an important role in protecting your eyes from sun and wind.  These ones especially.  See how big the frames are?  You can’t even see my eyebrows in these, and with my eyebrows, that’s saying something.

2.  Even the cheap ones can be pretty cute and stylish.  I found this particular pair in a consignment shop in Lexington, Kentucky.  They were $10.  I don’t know what brand they are or why they were consigned, but they’re awfully cute. 

Check out the sophisticated gold detail here:

And the fabulous pinkness here:

3.  Sunglasses can help you avoid awkward moments with strangers.  (This is very important in my life.)

In addition to never being able to hold onto my sunglasses, I am also pretty awkward socially.  Not in a debilitating, I-have-a-diagnosed-social-condition way, but just in the fact that I’m shy and never really mastered the art of Successful Interaction With People You Don’t Know Well.

I go running outside a lot in the summer, and now that I’ve moved here, I walk around my neighborhood pretty frequently, too (more on my cozy, sweet neighborhood in a later post).  Downtown you don’t have to look at anyone because there are too many people and no one cares, but when the street is pretty empty and there are only two or so people coming toward me, I feel panicky.

You know what I mean: Should I smile?  Should I say hi?  Should I even make eye contact?  Uuuuugggghhhh.

Sunglasses solve that problem.  You can stare at the person coming toward you and size them up, wait for them to make eye contact if they wish, and respond appropriately. 

And no one will ever know you’re doing this, because your sunglasses hide your eyes completely.  Otherwise, you have to do the awkward dance of pretending to concentrate very hard on anything but the person, and then just as they're about to pass, you pretend you just realized they're there and give them a pleasant smile. 

This is why I try never to leave home without my sunglasses, and this is why they are the best thing ever.